Exclusive Brethren Refuse Parental Rights in Custody Battle Over Children

The father, who grew up in Walmer, has been locked in a prolonged legal battle with the Exclusive Plymouth Brethren over custody of his two children. The sect, known for its strict rules and segregation, has cut him off from his children and refused to acknowledge his parental rights. The court orders and phone calls from the father have gone unanswered, as the Brethren steadfastly maintain their stance. The father, who is not being named to protect his minor children, has spent over R300 000 on legal bills in an attempt to regain contact with his children.

In the Exclusive Brethren, members who deviate from the religious line are “withdrawn from,” a term used to describe those who are excluded from the community. The father raised concerns about the sect’s rigid rules, including home schooling, restrictions on voting and university attendance, and prohibitions on socializing with “worldly people.” He described the daily meetings, held at 6am or 7pm and four times on Sundays, as a source of emotional distress. “I felt like I was dying inside,” he said, referring to the constant rants about the brethren who left in 1970.

The leader of the South African chapter of the Exclusive Brethren, Deryck Noakes, has not commented on the case, stating only that he will not provide details. However, court documents and emails reveal the sect’s determination to prevent the father from seeing his children. In a notable instance, Noakes sent an email to court officials requesting that Judge Glenn Goosen receive it. The email included a Bible verse and a plea for the father to be “taken out,” a reference to the sect’s belief in the infallible Word of God.

The father’s estranged wife has not responded to calls for comment, leaving him without support from within the community. His primary concern for his children is the social isolation they face and the limited gene pool within the sect. With only 300 Exclusive Brethren in South Africa and about 120 in Port Elizabeth, the father fears the long-term consequences of his children’s upbringing. He described the men who reported his conversations to the elders as former friends from his childhood, expressing a sense of betrayal and confusion. “I Googled what makes a cult and told them we ticked almost every box,” he said, emphasizing the need for freedom of choice.

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